MY HUSBAND AND I attended a seminar during which a woman was helping people find enough time to perform all the duties required of them. The attendees seemed to think her suggestions helpful until she said, “You need to lower your standards.”
For Adventists, standards have a special meaning, including integrity and honesty. They also incorporate health principles, such as not smoking, drinking, or doing drugs. Many of us have been told all our lives, “Hold your standards high and never lower them!”
Perhaps if this woman had used a different word, such as “expectations,” the acceptance by the group would have been different.
Do we need to lower our expectations for ourselves? Are they unreasonable and unhealthy? What if we can’t meet all the expectations that we place on ourselves or that others demand of us? What things are more important—our expectation of having the house dusted every week or taking time to create memories with our children and spouse?
When we modify the expectations we place on ourselves, we might find time to create plans for making Sabbaths interesting and fun for our children/teenagers rather than have the car squeaky clean. We also need to set a boundary in order to have meaningful time with Jesus every day.
For each person, expectations will be different, but it’s important to remember that the enemy has all sorts of “lures” to make us lower our good expectations, one of them being the media. There are many interesting and even good things in
the media, but even the good things can consume our time and attention and often need to be curtailed. Time boundaries affect our spiritual relationship with God—the eternal destiny of ourselves and our families is at stake.
Determine what are the nonnegotiable things in life. Give them priority space and set boundaries around them. I once heard a saying that I’ve kept with me ever since: “The very worst enemy of the best things in life are the good things in
life.”
