SHE WORKS IN THE KITCHEN, like a Martha. Occasionally I hear the clink of dishes and rattle of silverware, and I stop and reflect that this woman has been my companion for longer than she has been with anyone else on earth. Soon she will call, and I will join her for another delightful meal.
She is a wonderful cook. As a pastor, I get to try a variety of different delicatessen delights, but somehow this woman manages to beat them all. She entertains and provides meals for multitudes in our home with ease and grace, all the while visiting and socializing with her guests.
I sometimes watch her in wonder—this woman who is my wife. Week after week she sits alone in the pew listening to her husband as he stands before the congregation. She knows this man better than any other person. She sees his faults and shortcomings, she lives his crises, his personal agonies, and his battles in trying to lead.
She has seen him this morning standing in front of the mirror in less than he wears in the pulpit. But she listens for a message from God through this man. She hears the remarks, the critiques of his sermons and his leadership, the lectures from people who hope to get a message to the pastor through his wife.
SPIRITUAL GIFTS
She is expected at every function, ministers to many at a hospital bedside. She opens her heart and her soul and ministers as much as her husband does to the many broken and hurting people in the church and carries the weight of unnumbered others she knows need attention and love. She is uncomfortable being in any limelight or leadership role, yet she can instinctively notice a troubled person in a crowd and manage to be by their side at a party. She has a remarkable spiritual gift of sensitivity and caring.
She shops carefully at the sales and yet manages to dress with flair and quiet elegance, somehow appearing neither dowdy nor tactless. At times the balancing act of being a very busy nurse, full-time mom and housekeeper, and first lady overwhelms her. In the solitude of her home she cries from discouragement, yet amazingly, she accepts it all and carries on with dignity and ministers with grace.
No amount of talent can equip anyone for such a role, for it is only by the grace of God that she is who she is and does what she does. God has called, and she has responded to that divine calling. God has used her and set her apart for one of the most challenging of all ministries, and only eternity will reveal the blessing she has been to so many.
Many pastors have lost both their ministry and their marriage because of the stress placed on their relationship, but God has blessed many of us in ministry with a spouse of sterling character and fortitude who, through it all, can still smile and give us a hug when we need one.
Give your pastor’s spouse a word of encouragement this weekend.
